It’s funny how the scenarios you play out in your mind differ greatly from reality. When I started my latest weight loss journey (actually, this is probably my first real “journey” — previously, they were just short trips), I envisioned that it would go relatively unnoticed until about 50-70 pounds in and people would just mention, sort of incidentally, “hey, you look like you’re losing weight.” In case you don’t know this, being overweight made it hard for me to be the center of attention.
Well, this is not what happened. As I have shared before, I was at the point of buy 4x shirts and baggy jeans, thinking I could hide in them. Apparently, this just offered me more room to grow and, eventually, 4x became my size. After losing close to 30 pounds, my previous clothing was mostly unwearable and I had to buy some better-fitting clothes. While this was a good problem to have, there was some anxiety there, too. I was afraid to let go of the “big clothes” because I was afraid that I might need them again (It was another month before I finally burned that bridge and donated them. I don’t plan on going back).
So, I go into work wearing smaller clothes and, that morning, I have a co-worker pull me to the side and say, “Can I ask you a personal question? Are you losing weight?” I give my standard answer, “Yes, I am working on it.” She say, “You’re looking good. Congratulations.” I thanked her. But, I walked away saying, “Oh, boy. It’s starting to be noticeable.”
Then, it started happening quite a bit more. There were a few people at church, a few more people at work and other family member commenting on my weight loss.
Here come the questions and my anxiety.
In my mind, I began thinking “wow, how bad have I been looking?”
But, after a few weeks, it’s gotten better. I looked at some pictures from a trip my wife and I took to Las Vegas this past June and realized that I do look different. The 4x shirts I was wearing in them were almost snug. Now, they are in the donation pile or buried in the back of the closet, taking up space (yes, I’ll be getting rid of them). Soon enough, the clothes I am wearing today will meet a similar fate.
Yes, I am being noticed but, when trying to lose 100+ pounds this is bound to happen. So, I’m getting used to the attention and the questions. Perhaps, if I do this right, I can help inspire someone else looking to make this change.