Monday, I hit the gym. Being the tough guy I am, I tried hitting the elliptical at the same intensity I had before I slacked off my workouts.  I finished and, for the next five minutes, tried to look composed as my jelly-like legs tried to support my large frame.  Then, I hit the weight room.  I said “I’ll start by bench pressing these 65 pound dumbbells and move up from there”.  Let me just say that, after two sets, my mind said “65 pound dumbbells–that’s a good place to stop”.  I had to face it…I’d lost the gains I made and now, I am in an “rebuilding” phase, so to speak.  My butt was kicked and I barely made it out of bed the next morning.

Yesterday, it was the first truly nice day of the year and I decided that, instead of hitting the treadmill, I would go for a long walk at one of the local parks.  I chose Sharon Woods, which is just outside of Cincinnati.  Somehow, I don’t remember the trail being that long and the hills that high.  Don’t get me wrong, I was the man on the first lap.  I did the 2.6 mile walk in good time.  I got some water and said, “Okay, now for lap #2″.  About 3/4 of a mile in, I hit a wall.  Then, some man who had to be at least 12 years older than me and about 3 inches shorter, walked past me like I was standing still.  I was like, “How is grandpa going to try to lap me?” and it was on!  My ego got the best of me and I refused to let this man leave me in the dust.  He knew I was there, too, because he kept looking over his shoulder.  A few times  my mind said, “you should just jog right past him.”  Then, my legs said to my mind, “shut up and mind your business!”  I did manage to stay about 15 steps behind the guy for the rest of the walk, while trying to pretend that I wasn’t basically being a stalker.  It didn’t help that we were parked in close proximity to each other so, this guy was likely thinking I was going to rob him or something.  That’s probably why he waited until I drove off to leave.

If I ever needed incentive to get back in shape, I got it.  If I see you in the park this summer old man, know I’m coming for you and may the best man win!

I have been hesitant to use that word.  Primarily, it’s due to the fact that it hasn’t been all that long.  However, the other is, living in the Midwest, not eating meat is considered almost sacrilegious. By not eating meat, you are one of “those people”.  But, the biggest obstacle to me claiming this has been the fact that, right now, I don’t look a whole lot different.  People naturally assume that all vegetarians all rail-thin and a big guy who doesn’t eat meat just doesn’t compute.

To those folks, I invoke my two favorite words: So what?

So what if you don’t understand my change in habits? So what if I don’t fit your picture (yet) of what a vegetarian looks like?  It’s a choice I am making to live healthier.

No, I am not lashing out at folks — this is the mental exercise I go through to stay focused on why I am doing this.

I had to do this just yesterday.  One of my co-workers, bless her heart, gave me the strangest look when she found out that I had brought a bag of steamed vegetables, a Boca Chik’n patty and some fruit for lunch.  Today, she was joking with me, saying she was surprised that I was still standing after eating “rabbit food” for lunch.

However, I suspect that I have been deriving more nutrients from the “rabbit food” I have been eating than from the fried and starch-filled diet I’d been consuming.  You know, the stuff you order by talking into the clown face?

I’m a vegetarian, with all the weird looks and questions that come with it.  I figure that, if I am going to be categorized, at least let it be related to something healthy.

This is somewhat reminiscent of how pink slime was allowed to be added to meat without having to inform the public.  Once the public was truly made aware of it, the was a huge backlash and grocery stores and restaurants were quick to go back to more normal mixtures of meat.  It’s my hope that the public gets informed and takes similar steps with this.  As parents, my wife and I would have a real problem with aspartame (or any other artificial sweetener) being put in our son’s milk at lunch.  So, just because the milk industry wants it to sweeten milk unnecessarily to turn it into something more akin to a soft drink, I don’t believe would should roll the dice just by buying a carton of milk.

The FDA is taking public comments on this issue.  If you’d like to post a public comment, you may do so at www.regulations.gov.  You will need the Docket number (FDA-2009-P-0147) and the agency (Food and Drug Administration) to submit you comment.

1. Quit eating meat cold-turkey (no pun intended): It was either a Sunday or Monday when I started.  I simply said, “today’s the day”.  By 5pm, I was ready to quit.  They were serving fried chicken in the cafeteria for lunch and I had gone down to grab some fruit to supplement when I had brought.  Agony!  Later, I drove by one of my favorite BBQ spots on the way home.  It took all I had not to pull in and order something.  However, I made it through the first day and it’s getting better for me.
2. Cut the dairy: I have found this to be a little more challenging than going meat-free.  This meant no half-an-half in my morning coffee, no “real” ice-cream, no greek yogurt, no pizza, no lasagna…you get the picture.  However, I am finding that, if given a chance, the substitutes are not bad at all.

So, what’s the upside for me?  The greatest benefit that I have seen is that my energy level is way up.  I don’t feel as lethargic.  In fact, my energy is so up that my family is looking at me like something’s wrong with me.  They are not used to seeing me moving around so much.  Also, I have lost about 10 pounds.  I would expect this to only improve as I work back into a normal exercise routine.

By no means do I stop here.  I have other goals with my eating.

1. Cutting my processed food intake to a minimum: It is almost frightening to see the amount of sodium that gets packed into processed food.  So, if I want to cut this back, processed foods have got to be worked out of my eating lifestyle.
2. Limit sugars: Too often, I have replace the meat with the sweet.  Sugar and corn syrup can stand in the way of weight loss goals so, I’ll be working to ease back on them.
3. Fixing my mental attitude: I have noticed that most of my challenges are not between my mouth and stomach but, between my ears.  Get my head right and focused, as well as not listening to the naysayers, is what I need.  Discouragement de-motivates and depresses.  You get them mind right and the body will fall in line.

I never thought I’d get so much from going meat-free.  It just goes to show the power of change in one’s life.

1. Do something drastic to kick-start my weight loss.
2. Hit the gym like a mad man.
3. Get disappointed when the results didn’t come right away.
4. Get depressed and revert back to bad habits.
5. Lather, rinse, repeat.

I tried juice fasts so many times that I am starting to get sick by smelling kale.  I don’t know if I could ever do raw foods for an entire week again.  Those that do, you have my undying respect.

In other words, I didn’t get fat in a week so, I am not losing it in a week.

For me, it’s about changing my thinking and lifestyle and then letting the benefits of those changes.  As a result, I am working on me, from a wholistic approach.  I am not just trying to change how I look.  I am trying to change how I view myself and to get past the feelings of guilt and the feelings of being trapped in my own body.

Also, it’s about not beating myself up for every mistake, magnifying its impact by 100 times and then letting those bad feelings derail me.  Let me elaborate on this.  Have you ever eaten some junk, like a doughnut for breakfast or take out for lunch and said, “heck, since I’ve already fallen of the wagon, I might as well eat badly for the rest of the day”?  Or, even worse, tell yourself that you’re weak and resign yourself to not ever being better.

I am looking to have fewer and fewer of THOSE days. Instead, I’m working on a new me.

I kept seeing the pounds continue to pack on and avoided the scale as if to tell myself that, if I didn’t know my weight, I wouldn’t have a problem.

Then, a few days back I said, “to hell with that!”   I had to get back on the wagon.  So, this week, I began the change I was needing.  Like I mentioned previously, I am working on my sugar addiction.  As I write this, I am going through withdrawal.  I haven’t had a soft drink, candy or dessert in 3 days.  I haven’t even been putting sugar in my coffee (thank you Whole Foods for making liquid stevia!).  Let me tell you, it’s definitely been a challenge!

I’ve also been cutting back on portions and eating more vegetables.  I still stand by the notion that I will not starve myself in a vain attempt to lose weight but, considering the number of calories I had been consuming, cutting back was highly necessary.

I have also been hitting the treadmill first thing in the morning to burn off the glucose before having breakfast.  Furthermore, water is now my drink of choice and I am staying well-hydrated.  The multiple trips to the bathroom are a testament to that.

The good news, the scale’s starting to go the other way.  Next week, I will be working weight training back in, which should help get me more fat-burning muscle.

For the first time in months, I feel back in control.

The diet that is used on a fat loss program is the ultimate determining factor on whether or not you will lose the weight. All the running in the world won’t do a thing if you are taking in excess calories (especially from the wrong sources such as sugars).

Oh, yes, sugar!  Sugar is in my life from morning to midnight.  Sugar in my coffee, sugar in my instant oatmeal, sugar in the pies I ate over the holidays, the soft drinks, the ice cream, the candy, etc., etc.  Quietly and not so quietly, my sugar addiction was taking over.  Let’s just look at yesterday.  I had 3 cups of coffee with about 4 teaspoons of sugar each.  My breakfast had included a big glop of grape jelly, my lunch included a sugary soft drink, my dinner included another sugary soft drink and a cupcake for dessert.  Sprinkled throughout all of this were multiple trips to a candy dish in my house.

I made up my mind that, starting today, I would begin confronting this addiction.  I laid out a new plan for eating and will start by severely cutting back on the sugar.  I had coffee, with Equal instead of sugar.  However, going forward, it will be stevia for sweetening.  My sugary oatmeal was replaced with an egg white.  My soft drink has been replaced with water.  No trip to the vending machine for me today, either.

Also, I’ve been telling the little devil sitting on my shoulder that he’s going to have to leave me alone.

Overcoming sugar addiction, like any other addiction, is a one-day-at-a-time process.

I am JP Smith.  I am a sugar addict and I am one day sober.

To add to my frustrations, the piano teacher must have been feeling generous because what is normally a half-hour lesson turned into an hour lesson.  So, a little after 8pm, we are headed home.

Now, it’s a game of beat the clock.  I get home, get changed (why didn’t I put on my gym clothes before I took him to piano?), grab some water and head to the gym.  I get there about 8:45pm.

Did I do everything I wanted to do?  No.  But, I was able to get some resistance training in for about an hour and didn’t need to rush through it.  More importantly, I didn’t let an excuse get in the way of a goal.

Things come up that require our attention all the time.  We have to be flexible enough to work around them.  In my case, I also have to look at how I adapt to these changes.  If I would have changed and gotten my stuff ready before my son’s lesson, I could have saved myself about 10 minutes, which might have allowed me to get in some cardio.  It’s a lesson learned and no reason to beat myself up but, I will take it as point to consider next time.

Now, let’s see if I can get back there tonight.

I like basketball but, with my weight and being in my 40′s, it can take its toll.  My knee had been feeling funny prior to my injuring it and a voice told me not to go that night but, I didn’t listen.  I was coming down court on defense and got hit with a double pick.  My knee buckled and I limped off the court.  I came back and tried to tough it out but, I was done for the night.   To make a long story short, though x-rays and an MRI show no signs of injury, I am not close to 100% yet.  However, something tells me had I kept up the exercise and the weight loss, I would have avoided this injury or, at least, been able to bounce back quicker.

After feeling sorry for myself for a while, I realized something — it wasn’t my body or my psyche that’s the issue, it’s inertia.  Inertia is describes as a physical object’s resistance to change to it’s state of motion or its state of rest.  I fell in the latter.  Sitting at home, in front of the TV or the computer, eating too much was okay with me.

But, this past week, it hit me.  I am an African American man in my 40′s with a bad diet and poor exercise habits.  I have been lucky so far but, diabetes, heart disease or a stroke could be in the none-too-distant future for me.  I have to change.

This past Thursday, I rejoined my old gym and Saturday, I went back to work.  I have been twice already and I am looking to make this a habit.  Next, I have to work on my eating.  I am hoping that better exercise will spur better eating which, in turn, will help me with my overall health. Let’s face it — what I have been doing hasn’t helped much.

So, yes, I am humbled but, hopeful, also.  I think I really have a chance this time.